Place: Belmont (oldie but goodie)
Time: Same Bat time (4:30 - whenever)
Channel: Same Bat Channel
From your Honorary Host: Stuart Hiserodt
Alright, here's the deal ... the Daffer project is over, I'm still coding documents, and I'm bored out of my mind! If I have to look at one more contract control sheet or search for Kirby's name in a document I'm going to go crazy! Well, the tough part about this is that I'm going to have to do it tomorrow and the next day no matter what. However, I could probably deal with it a little bit better if I had a few drinks with some friends. [Lame way to start out I know. It was either that or tell you that I had adopted some children from Africa and you should all come and welcome them to our country with some flavored vodca shots.]
Well, truth is Paul isn't getting any younger! He has come down with a terrible disease and we're not sure if he's going to make it. The disease is called I'llpayforyourdrinkitis, and apparently you get the disease from working too hard for too long a time. The doctor said it looks like he got it while working on the 6th floor at 700 Lavaca ... or from the trip to Thailand. No, I'm kidding! He's fine and we all saw how hard he worked, so we know it couldn't have been from that. [Rimshot]
Alright, alright ... I'm trying to play the sympathy card and/or bribe you to come. Truth is I'm bored, fed up with work, and miss my drinking friends! I imagine that you've got to have days like that too. You come home from work and watch the same old T.V. show and wish you did something different that day. Well, here's another chance to turn it all around. It's time to get together and knock back a couple. Remember these happy hours? We use to all get together and actually drink a few drinks and relax ... then Jill or Steph wouldn't show up the next day. Realistically, when was the last time YOU came to one of these happy hours? Maybe you made one three months ago, but thought ... I'll make it again one day. Well you and I both know that's bullshit, but I can think of 10 good reasons to go ahead and come anyway.
10. Think of this as a Daffer reunion. If you don't come you'll see people out and they'll ask, "Hey, did you go to that reunion?" Then you'll say, "Yes, and I'm pregnant now! It was the greatest night of my life and I really wish I would video taped it, so you could see how stupid you must now feel for missing it!"
9. LST (Lone Star Todd) can drink his namesake instead of Bailey's from a shoe. (Watch Old Gregg on youtube.com ... unless you have a real job then you should just watch it on your iphone ... oh, you don't have an iphone? Loser.)
8. Clovis will likely take a shot of tequila and make you pay for it! (Not really a reason to come, but you remember how fun that night was, right?)
7. Steph will be able to order her drink and have 34 lemon wedges come with it!
6. Dustin will be there ... and if your day was boring at least someone will have something cool to talk about.
5. Golden Rings!!!! (Ten is hard to come up with ... give me one)
4. Andrew and Luke will finally make an appearance. (maybe)
3. George finally has just ONE job!
2. Because Cara, Claudia, Amanda are TOO nice to not come now that they have been specifically pointed out and their presence requested.
And the number 1 reason to come on Thursday to the Daffer happy hour ...
(you give it a shot ... I did 9, okay 8, see if you can get one. I'll give the real number 1 on Wed. ... or I'll forget and just buy the first round to make up for it.)
15 comments:
#1 Reason: Thursday is the VP Debate and it will make it a whole lot more fun to watch when sloshed.
1. Palin told you to (and she knows how to shoot an A.K.-47 ... I think you better do what the lady in the American flag bikini says)
You ever drunk Bailey's from a shoe?
Do you want to go to a club where people wee on each other?
I got all things that are good.
It's attached to your rod, mother licker!
It's Old Gregg's vagina! I got a mangina!
You seen my downstairs mix-up.
I'm Old Gregg!
Bailey's. Mmm... creamy. Soft creamy beige.
Make an assessment.
Yes sir, thank ya sir!
Easy now my fuzzy little man peach
Some say he's half-man, half-fish. Others say he's more of a 70-30 split; whatever the percentage he's one fishy bastard.
Some say Old Gregg is like a.. a big fish finger. But big like as in a garage. Imagine a fish finger as big as a garage!
And this one's as close as you can get to Baileys without your eyes gettin' wet.
Do you love me?
If your eyes don't love my eyes I'm going to suck them up with a powerful Hoover and put them up my downstairs mix-up (live show)
I'm gonna hurt you...
Boo, I really want to come, especially since Stuart is in such a slump and we all need to talk football...but already have dinner plans. Hopefully next time!
Alright, I'm not in that big of a slump ... I do sound pathetic though, I'll give you that. It's a part of begging.
I forgot to congratulate Lisa and tell everyone that she's with child. Hooray for Lisa and procreation! (Somebody's got to do it. And it ain't gonna be me.)
I'll see you all there if you're still drinking circa 7. You know how those firms are; you can never leave the plantation - I mean building - early.
Does she know how to shoot an AK because she's so close to Russia up there?
Is the happy hour Thursday, as usual, or on Wednesday?
Shoot, an actual call out. I was planning on driving into Houston on Thurs, but work is sucking so much, I may sneak away for a drink & have to go back to work. That's not a good thing, huh? Let's hope I see you guys there!
go-getta, MOTM is on Thursday.
Anonymous poet, I want some of the stuff you are smoking.
and the number 1 reason ...
1. I am going to have my own bailout! Since I'm not sure how many people are committing to the happy hour I've come up with a plan to make sure it goes off without a hitch. I'm going to pick the people I like and then buy them a drink. However, just so you know I'm going to need to borrow some money from everybody after I dole out these drinks. The way I see it, there is actually a good chance that we can all make money on this ... just as long as we get paid back! Trust me.
Oh, and I can't forget about main street ... ummm ... I mean ... the other folks on 6th street. Those poor folks got hustled into going out for drinks and they didn't know what they were doing. Think about it, if we don't do get those poor people drinks no one will go downtown and then as a result there won't be any bars for us to go to.
It's a known fact that American society is based on happy hours, and if we don't make this sacrafice then we will have to restructure our whole drinking time schedule. We'll have to drink in the morning and work at night. It won't be an hour for drinking anymore, but we'll have to establish 25 minute increments before and after the 11:00 am hour. People will put gin in their vodca tonics, limes will be replaced with limon juice, cats and dogs will start sleeping together ... it will be utter chaos!
Pretty simple right?! So I think it's pretty clear we need to get downtown and drink ... otherwise life as we know it will be destroyed.
Stuart...nicely done...this has created quite the stir...
I will be there (dah)!!, even though I am still bitter that you did not come to mine...nor did any of you for that matter....except Dustin and Paul, both of you I love!!
Well, I'll do anything for a drink. And for Stephanie. And Paul.
Cara, what time will you be "stopping by?" We should try to cross paths.
I seriously hope y'all are still there circa 7:00p.m. because that's my estimated time of arrival and I'm claiming my free drink from Mr. Hiserodt's bail out plan.
Also, since I don't have time to perform research (though it would probably take less time than typing this sentence), I intend to learn why vodka is spelled with a "c" throughout this post.
Holla.
Because I don't spel so gud.
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